Myths

Myths Reality
Only crazy or sexually starved men rape women, therefore, one can recognize someone who might be a rapist simply by looking at him. Sexual assault is a crime of power, control, and violence. It is not caused by being sexually starved. Studies reveal that “rapists” are ordinary “normal” men.
A man who has been sexually aroused by a person needs to have sex. Men, like women, do not physically need to have sex once they have been sexually aroused.
A woman is responsible for a man’s sexual excitement; therefore she cannot stop the sexual activity once she has “turned him on”. A woman may be the stimulus that causes the arousal, but men can control their sexual behaviour just as well as a woman can. It is the brain, not the sexual organs, that controls arousal. A woman is never under any obligation to relieve a man of sexual tension.
Women secretly wish to be assaulted. Many men and women have fantasies of being “taken” sexually or being swept off their feet in a moment of passion. There is an important distinction, however, between fantasy and rape, a woman is in control of her fantasy, she is not in control of rape.
Most women enjoy sexual assault or they like rough sex. This belief has evolved from society’s continuous tendency to link sex with violence. This is evident in modern videos, popular films/music and fashion magazines. All suggest that “sexy” sex is mixed with violence. The truth is, however, that no one likes to experience pain, fear, degradation, or humiliation.
Rape usually occurs in a dark, isolated location, such as an alley or parking lot. Most sexual assaults occur in someone’s home. The next most common location s in someone’s car.
Women “ask for it” by how they dress or act. No one asks to be degraded or hurt. Sexual assault is the only crime where the victim is seen to be more responsible for the crime than the offender. Sexual assault victims are often asked why they acted in a certain way, or said certain things, this blames the victim and protects the offender.
Only young, attractive women are raped. Women of any age, race, class, lifestyle, or physical attributes may potentially be sexually assaulted.
A woman who has agreed to sex previously with the same partner or other partners cannot be raped. Consent at the time of the sexual activity determines whether or not sexual assault has occurred. Any time a person is forced to have sex, when they have not consented, is sexual assault, no matter who the partners are.
If a man spends money on a date by buying dinner or gifts, or does her a favour, she then owes him sex. No one should ever feel that they owe sex as a payment to someone else.
Women rape men, just like men rape women. It is true that men can be raped, but is usually men who rape other men. Because of our culture and gender roles, the majority of sexual assaults are by men against women. Sexual assault is not sex; women who are sexual initiators are not rapists, unless the male did not consent and was forced into that act.
It is not really rape if a weapon or physical violence was not used, or if the victim was not hysterical. Most sexual assaults are perpetrated by an acquaintance, who is more likely to use tricks, verbal pressure, threats or mild force (twisting an arm or gripping) rather than a weapon or severe beating. A woman who has been assaulted may be hysterical, but the more common reaction is one of shock or disbelief, and may present herself as calm and collected.